Lennie's chair
My chair
Tuesday 20th Oct 3.30am
Alarm on phone goes off, but phone is on landing borrowed by daughter. Stagger out of bedroom and fall over Lennie, who is sitting outside bedroom door. Hiss some bad cat words at him. Stumble downstairs in dark. Fall over Lennie again in dark hallway, who lets out a caterwaul and dives through catflap. Hiss some more bad words at him and take husband to work.
Tusday 20th October 4.05am
Climb out of car. Lennie is delighted to see me after my long absence and winds enthusiastically around my legs, sending me sprawling on drive. Moan bad words at him as he prances around the lawn switching the security light on and off in a mad cat disco. He beats me to the front door and dives triumphantly throught the cat flap.
I enter the small,dark hallway cautiously and make way to kitchen door, where Lennie is waiting hopefully to be fed. Again. Squeeze myself through door, poking Lennie back with foot. He meeows folornly. Make tea and go back to bed, shutting bedroom door to prevent Lennie entering. He sits crying on the landing. Guiltily I cover my ears and try to sleep.
Tuesday 20th October 4.45am
I am awoken violently by a mad axeman bursting through the bedroom window. Or so it sounds. The curtain twitches and Lennie's nose pokes through. He pads contentedly on to the bed and sits calmly, preening and scratching himself. We stare at each other until I am outstared and my head flops back onto the pillow.
Tuesday 2oth Oct 5.02am
The madman has got in and is creeping up my bed. Tentatively, I reach out my hand and feel Lennie's fur. He is inching slowly towards me. I encourage back down the bed-via the means of my foot through the duvet. He begins to creep back up again. We repeat the process three times until he dribbles on my hand. I carry him -complaining-to the door and put him on the landing. Close door. Close Window. Get back into bed.
Tuesday 20th Oct 6.15am
Clock begins musical alarm. Lennie begins wailing on landing. I emerge onto landing in darkness carefully. Hooray. Lennie is not there. I put my foot on top step and whirl wildly into space, grabbing for the handrail before I break my neck. Lennie shoots wailing throught the catflap.
Tuesday 20th Oct 6.20am
Make tea and take vitamin tablets standing barefoot on kitchen floor. Lennie has turned himself into a footwarmer and is lying on my feet, purring contentedly. I turn him into a mop and scoot him across the floor. When he realises I am aiming for the utility room he fights me over the fork and Whiskas tin. Greedily he starts scoffing half a tin.
Tuesday 20th Oct 7am
Showered, exercised,dressed.No Lennie. Craftily I open side bedroom window for fresh air. Start to brush hair and then pin up. I turn. Lennie is sitting blinking and scratching on the bed. He looks so content, I vow to be nicer to him tomorrow. Close window and leave door open so he does not tear carpet up.Like he did before. Several times.
Wednesday 21st Oct
Alarm goes off. Lennie begins mewling on landing...
